A Really Emotional Week

Can You, or Do You Know Anybody Who Might Be Able to … ?

Survivors all over the world need:

More drop-in groups
A men’s group
A group meeting in European time
A 12-Step group

Techies, or almost-techies needed:
A person to add items to the GrassRoots website. Ready-to-go text – no editing, typing, etc. required
Somebody who can coach people who want to use ZOOM, make podcasts, make videos, create slides
Somebody to handle Q&A periods for Webinars
Or somebody who can write directions for these things, so that people can do it themselves.

If all of that sounds too hard, write a comment giving:
Your favorite kid’s book and/or
Your favorite healing book and/or
Your favorite healing song and/or
Your favorite something else.

Write and let us know if you are interested in any of these requests. If you have other ideas, great! We want to hear about them, too. Use the comment section or write https://grassroots-ra-mc-collective.org/contact-us/

Thank you!!!!

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RA/MC Panel at the International Trafficking and Social Justice Conference

We did it! We taped our panels, both of them. Now we can relax until September 22, when we meet again for live questions and answers.

Our time-slots are 1:45 and 3:15 on Thursday, September 22. 2022. Read more about our presentations, plus descriptions of all the other presentations at: https://app.traffickingconference.com/schedule

Please come see us in (virtual) person!  Survivors should choose the “Free Attendee Registration” option and remember to write for the registration code number. Register at    https://www.traffickingconference.com/register

Also, once you have registered for the conference, you must register for each event you want to attend.

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Pornhub News

In January 2020, Pornhub was the largest and most popular porn website, the 10th most visited website across the Internet (more than Netflix, Amazon, or Yahoo), and the third most influential tech company on society-at-large, only surpassed by Facebook and Google.

On June 20, the New Yorker published “The Fight to Hold Pornhub Accountable.” https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2022/06/20/the-fight-to-hold-pornhub-accountable I haven’t read it yet, but it must be really damning. A couple of days later, the Chief Executive Officer, Feras Antoon, and the Chief Operating Officer, David Tassillo, left without naming their successors. The same day,  about 30% of its employees were fired with no notice. Their computers were immediately shut down, and all methods of communication were disabled.

Who says we can’t fight back????

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A Really Emotional Week

On Thursday, we taped our presentation for the International Trafficking and Social Justice Conference.

I had spent the better part of each day of the week trying to find the latest version of my talk. This was no small task, as my computer filing system resembles my paper filing system, which consists of large piles of stuff all over the floor. Next time I write something that requires many revisions, I shall consider keeping a running list of the names of the drafts and where they are to be found.

Special thanks to River, Mary, and j., who read the text numerous times, gave really helpful suggestions, and listened to me read it aloud. I used their words verbatim in many places. Not only did they help make it a better presentation, but they also calmed me down.

Being a perfectionist, of course, I am dissatisfied. With the text. With my voice. With my gestures (or lack of them.) With my appearance. Actually, it’s not perfectionism, it is a resurgence of the lies they told me throughout my childhood. There is nothing like videotaping oneself giving the short version of one’s RA/MC/OA experiences to stir up old messages, old feelings.

Anyway, it is done. It is a big weight off my shoulders, and the last part, the live questions and answers on the actual day, will be easy in comparison. One cannot prepare for that!

~~~~~~~~~~

Something else really hard happened this week. I don’t want to write about it because I don’t want it to be true. I also don’t want to make anybody else sad. But it is sad, and it is true. If you have been reading the “Update on Baker”, you may be somewhat prepared.

Anyway, Baker never started eating – he ate less and less each day. The medication his vet gave him may have made him more comfortable, but it didn’t do anything to combat the disease. That told us that irritable bowel was not the problem and that it was cancer. We had chosen to treat the most common feline bowel cancer, and it turned out to be one of the less common ones. We made sensible decisions, but we guessed wrong. It’s okay (no it’s not!) If we had guessed right, and he had gone into remission, he would only have lived a couple of extra months.

So Baker died yesterday, and I have been crying non-stop.

The wonderful thing is that this was an open adoption, and his previous person and I have become friends. We made treatment decisions together, and we were always on the same page. She is a wonderfully kind person, and I love that her name is Katt.

This week, Katt’s daughter and her daughter’s significant other came to visit Baker. They spent hours petting him and reminiscing. I spent time with them, then back to ZOOM, then more time. We shared vegan pizza. They sent me his baby pictures – he was such a cute little kitten.

Thursday, right after the taping, I spoke to the vet, and she said the kindest thing to do would be to help him die peacefully. I immediately called Katt, we discussed the options one more time, and she agreed that was the best choice.

A couple of days ago, I learned I had been exposed to COVID. So I was in isolation and could not bring him to the vet to be with him in his last moments. The three of them gladly took him in. My vet arranged for a ZOOM call, so I could sort of be there. I really, really appreciated her thoughtfulness, and it was great to see how gentle she was with everybody

For one last time, I saw how beautiful Baker was and how terribly thin and lethargic he had become. I knew he was surrounded by familiar people who loved him. It was all okay. I cried my eyes out.

They brought his body back, and we buried him in my garden, between Dakota (my previous cat) and where the sweet peas are in early summer. The header shows me covering him with flowers and then dirt.

Now all that there is left to do is grieve.

~~~~~~~~~~

Upcoming Holidays

August
8/1 Lammas/Lughnasadh
8/11 Full Moon
8/13 Friday the 13th
8/15 (?) Assumption of the Blessed Virgin Mary
8/24 (?) St. Bartholomew’s Day

September
9/5 – 9/7 Feast of the Beast/Marriage to the Beast
9/5 Labor Day (United States)
9/10 Full Moon
9/22 Fall Equinox
9/29 (?) Michaelmas/Feast of Archangel Michael and of all Angels

Dates Important to Nazi and Neo-Nazi groups

July 29: Hitler proclaimed leader of the Nazi party.
August 1: Lammas
Early August through October: Various preparations are done in readiness for October, the month with the largest number of celebrations.

~~~~~~~~~~

You can find more information on the following holidays at: Candlemas – https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2012/01/21/candlemas/
Valentine’s Day https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2016/02/10/valentines-day/
Beltane – https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2013/04/28/beltane/
Mothers’ Day – https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2016/04/26/mothers-day/
Fathers’ Day https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2020/06/20/ritual-abuse-and-fathers-day/
Summer Solstice (corrected text) – https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2013/06/15/well-this-is-embarrassing/
Lammas – https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/category/lamas/
and https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2012/07/23/august-ritual-dates/
Feast of the Beast/Bride of Satan: Part 1 – https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2013/08/31/the-feast-of-the-beast/
Feast of the Beast/Bride of Satan: Part 2 – https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2017/03/20/feast-of-the-beast-part-ii/
Fall Equinox – https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2012/09/16/the-fall-equinox/
Halloween (personal) https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2016/10/11/halloween/
Halloween (background) – https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2011/10/02/samhainhalloween/
Thanksgiving – https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2016/11/20/thanksgiving/
Yule/Winter Solstice – https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2012/12/15/yulewinter-solstice/

Eventbrite invitation to ra/mc poetry reading

Here is the Eventbrite invitation

eventbrite.com.au/e/ritual-abuse-survivors-read-their-poems-of-suffering-and-healing-tickets-179703978437

This link leads to the webpage where you register, where you get your ticket, where you can contact us (at the very bottom of the page.)

Forward it to as many people as you want. All are welcome: survivors, therapists, and other allies.

Registering adds you to our mailing list.

Hope to see all of you there!

An online poetry reading by and for ritual abuse/mind control survivors.

Please join us on Saturday 23 October, 4:00 pm to 5:30 pm (Pacific Daylight Time) for an online poetry reading by ritual abuse/mind control survivors.

There will be 45 minutes of scheduled poetry readings, with the final 45 minutes allocated for an open mic poetry session (readers to nominate themselves on the day – 3 to 5 minutes per person) and for any questions and conversation.

Ritual abuse and mind control, by their very nature, can trigger strong emotions. The poetry will not be censored and we are not asking the poets to give trigger warnings. We will give a general trigger warning and suggestions for self-care at the start of the program.

This invite is open to survivors, therapists, support people and allies.

Presented by:
Jean Riseman, River and Leni of GrassRoots Ritual Abuse/Mind Control Survivors Collective
Chaired by Leni of Grassroots Collective

Please review the time zone in your local area. Time zones include:
Saturday October 23, 4:00 pm – 5:30 pm Pacific Daylight Time
Saturday October 23, 5:00 pm – 6:30 pm Mountain Daylight Time
Saturday October 23, 6:00 pm – 7:30 pm Central Daylight Time
Saturday October 23, 7:00 am – 8:30 pm East Coast Daylight Time
Sunday October 24, 10:00 am -11:30 am Melbourne AEST

AT THE BOTTOM OF THE PAGE
Grassroots RA/MC Collective
Organiser of Ritual Abuse Survivors Read Their Poems of Suffering and Healing

[Follow] [Contact]

How to sign up:

To sign up, click the button labeled “Register” at the right of the announcement.

On the next page, click “Register.” No typing is required (or possible) on this page.

On the next page, fill out everything and, once again ,click “Register.”

The following text appears on the final page

Thanks for your order!

ticket #1234567890

Edit Post

Preview(opens in a new tab)about:blankParagraph: Change block type or styleChange text alignment

Eventbrite invitation to ra/mc poetry reading

Here is the Eventbrite invitation

eventbrite.com.au/e/ritual-abuse-survivors-read-their-poems-of-suffering-and-healing-tickets-179703978437

This link leads to the webpage where you register, where you get your ticket, where you can contact us (at the very bottom of the page.)

Forward it to as many people as you want. All are welcome: survivors, therapists, and other allies.

Registering adds you to our mailing list.

Hope to see all of you there!



An online poetry reading by and for ritual abuse/mind control survivors.

Please join us on Saturday 23 October, 4:00 pm to 5:30 pm (Pacific Daylight Time) for an online poetry reading by ritual abuse/mind control survivors.

There will be 45 minutes of scheduled poetry readings, with the final 45 minutes allocated for an open mic poetry session (readers to nominate themselves on the day – 3 to 5 minutes per person) and for any questions and conversation.

Ritual abuse and mind control, by their very nature, can trigger strong emotions. The poetry will not be censored and we are not asking the poets to give trigger warnings. We will give a general trigger warning and suggestions for self-care at the start of the program.

This invite is open to survivors, therapists, support people and allies.



Presented by:
Jean Riseman, River and Leni of GrassRoots Ritual Abuse/Mind Control Survivors Collective
Chaired by Leni of Grassroots Collective



Please review the time zone in your local area. Time zones include:
Saturday October 23, 4:00 pm – 5:30 pm Pacific Daylight Time
Saturday October 23, 5:00 pm – 6:30 pm Mountain Daylight Time
Saturday October 23, 6:00 pm – 7:30 pm Central Daylight Time
Saturday October 23, 7:00 am – 8:30 pm East Coast Daylight Time
Sunday October 24, 10:00 am -11:30 am Melbourne AEST



AT THE BOTTOM OF THE PAGE
Grassroots RA/MC Collective
Organiser of Ritual Abuse Survivors Read Their Poems of Suffering and Healing

[Follow] [Contact]

How to sign up:

To sign up, click the button labeled “Register” at the right of the announcement.

On the next page, click “Register.” No typing is required (or possible) on this page.

On the next page, fill out everything and, once again ,click “Register.”

The following text appears on the final page


Thanks for your order!

ticket #1234567890

YOU’RE GOING TO
Ritual Abuse Survivors Read Their Poems of Suffering and Healing
1 Ticket sent to
me@ssomething.com
DATE
Sat, 23 Oct 2021 4:00 PM – 5:30 PM PDT
ONLINE EVENT
You will receive the link to the event content in your order confirmation email, and in a reminder email before the event starts.



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YOU’RE GOING TO
Ritual Abuse Survivors Read Their Poems of Suffering and Healing
1 Ticket sent to
me@ssomething.com
DATE
Sat, 23 Oct 2021 4:00 PM – 5:30 PM PDT
ONLINE EVENT
You will receive the link to the event content in your order confirmation email, and in a reminder email before the event starts.

My Presentation at the An Infinite Mind’s “Healing Together” Conference

* The International’s Society for the Study of Trauma and Dissociation (ISSTD) Annual Conference is coming up. The pre-conference is March 12 – 13, and the main conference is March 14 – 16. It’s being held in San Francisco. Information: https://annualconference.isst-d.org/

I’m attending the conference this year and would love to connect with anybody who is going. We could hang out at break times and get to know each other better.

ISSTD is also offering two regional conferences. 

*A Day With Professor Michael Salter” – plus Margot Sunderland, Adah Sachs, Kathryn Livingston, Mark Linington, Elly Hanson, Sue Richardson, Valerie Sinason, and Nancy Borrett – is in London on March 5. Information: https://www.isst-d.org/training-and-conferences/upcoming-conferences/london-regional-conference/

* “Diagnosis and “Treatment of DID and PTSD in Indigenous Peoples” is in Fairbanks AK on June 17 – 20. Information: https://www.isst-d.org/training-and-conferences/upcoming-conferences/fairbanks-regional-conference/

~~~~

The vibe at An Infinite Mind’s conference was just like last year’s, except stronger. It was warm and friendly and accepting, also open and trusting and real. Once again, there was a great deal of diversity compared to other conferences I have been to. There were more men, more differently-abled people, more people of different races, more gay, lesbian, bi, and trans people, a wider range of ages, and more people with green or blue or pink hair. That is greatly to be celebrated.

And guess what? There were almost 100 more people there than there were last year! They must be doing something right.

I learned some new things, met some amazing people, touched base with people I had hung out with last year. It’s relaxing and energizing at the same time to be with others who are like me in so many ways, and I wish I could experience it 24/365. But I’m not complaining – the memory of those 24/48-plus hours will buoy me up for many a day.

So – the presentation. I survived, obviously. There were about 30, 35 people there, over half survivors, and the rest split between therapists and support people. I had prepared the talk for therapists, so I made it more general, more inclusive, as I went along. There was time for questions after each section, and that worked very nicely, People quickly engaged and they liked that format.

It felt weird because I went into flashback almost immediately. I’d expected the flashback to come after the presentation, the way it did at previous conferences. But no, it was 90 minutes of flashback, which gradually lifted afterwards. I felt like an actress playing a part, and I could feel that the way I moved my body and my hands was not normal for me. I couldn’t tell about my voice because I was using a microphone, so, of course, my voice sounded very different to me. Although I didn’t feel like a different person, you might say I switched, and another part gave the presentation. I don’t know.

I lost my place once, fell silent, and then said, “I don’t know where I am.” Nobody seemed to take it literally. I quickly found my footing, apologized, and continued. And I did let one set of questions go on too long and had to rush through the end. None of this was a disaster. People came up to me afterwards and thanked me and were very warm and supportive. And nobody knew I was in a flashback unless I told on myself!

So it was just fine – it really was.

One thing I really love about being in a group of RA survivors is that we can go from tears to laughter in a minute. So many of us seem to have the same sense of humor. It’s a bond. I love it! And I’m glad that people think I am funny – humor is such a gift.

The ice is broken, and now there can be other RA presentations. Maybe even a panel! There is plenty of time to brainstorm and plan.

Perhaps you-all could help start the brainstorming and share your ideas in the comments section. If you could go to a conference on DID, what would you want the RA sessions to be like? Let your imagination soar!! Topics, of course, but also format. Academic presentations, art shows, music, anything.

Perhaps I could develop some of those ideas into a blog post.

 

PS This is not an apology; it’s an explanation. The post is late this time because I was on the plane coming home on the 10th. Yesterday, I made time to write it, but I didn’t post it until today. I read it with fresh eyes, did some editing, and and then clicked “publish.” I still have lots of every-day life things to do – get some food in the fridge, read 150 emails and sort out the important ones, laundry, things like that.

PPS The cat is much better! I was afraid he would die when I was away, and I wouldn’t get to say goodbye. Luckily, I worried for nothing. Magical thinking tells me that it was my fretting that made him better, but logically I think it was his resilient little body.

~~~~

Upcoming Holidays

February
2/14 Valentine’s Day
2/25 Shrove Tuesday/Mardi Gras
2/25 Walpurgis Day
2/26 Ash Wednesday

March 
3/1 St. Eichstadt’s Day
3/9 Full moon<
3/13 Friday the Thirteenth
3/17 Spring Equinox
3/17 St. Patrick’s Day
3/24 Feast of the Beast/Bride of Satan

April
4/1 April Fool´s Day
4/5 Palm Sunday
4/7 Full moon
4/8 Day of the Masters
4/9 Maundy Thursday (commemoration of the Last Supper)
4/10 Good Friday
4/11 Holy Saturday
4/12 Easter Sunday<
4/26 Grand Climax/De Meur
4/30 Walpurgisnacht/May Eve

Dates Important to Nazi and Neo-Nazi groups
2/10 Tu Bishvat/Tu B’Shevat (celebration of spring)

(NOTE: Not all groups meet on Jewish holidays. Some groups also mark Candlemas, Beltane, Lammas, Halloween, the solstices and the equinoxes.)