Mothers’ Day and GrassRoots RA/MC Survivors’ Collective

Mothers’ Day

MOTHER

i weep when your title is called. v

i never understood you. weak woman of child. comforter. betrayer.

you chose to stay. you chose to abide. you chose to adorn the robes.

i remember you dressed up as a black cat in a kindergarten play.

i remember your soup.

you were a victim of the times.

From Leni’s blog, “My life as a dissociative.”  https://ourdissociativelives.wordpress.com/2022/05/08/mother/

Once again this year, I skimmed over Mothers’ Day…until I read what Leni wrote about her mother. I found it beautiful and evocative. I almost saw my own mother in Leni’s writing – but she was never a black cat in a school play, and I never went to kindergarten.

How very different both our mothers might have been if the society they lived in had known as much about trauma as ours does today. It makes me very sad.

She was always a vague, undefined figure to me. Partly it was her passive personality, partly because I was raised by others for the first ten years of my life. She was more like a babysitter than a mother. I considered my mother a minor player in my life.

We didn’t celebrate Mothers’ Day, either in the Day Life or the Night Life. It wasn’t a big Hallmark holiday back then. No wonder I don’t react much to Mothers’ Day.

Here is a quote from a post about Mothers’ Day that I wrote in 2016. https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2016/04/26/mothers-day/

“One year, though, I got a shock when I was driving to therapy. I was listening to a C&W radio station, and there was a song about a mother comforting her daughter about loss. The loss of her best friend when she was a child, a divorce, and finally, the mother’s death. “What can I do to help you say goodbye?” The tears were streaming down my face.

“My mother would not have comforted me. At best, she would have told me to act my age. As a result, I learned early on not to let her know my feelings. I never went to her for advice, for a quick good-luck hug, for a smile on hearing good news. I aimed for a distant, polite relationship, like two strangers who don’t much like each other thrown into close proximity. I got the distance, all right, but underneath the veneer was seething resentment and anger.”

I didn’t know then that I could miss what I had never had.

 ~~~~~~~~~

GrassRoots RA/MC Survivors’ Collective

I just realized that I hadn’t written at length about the project taking up most of my time. It provides me with a lot of fulfilling experiences, including working with a kick-ass group of survivors, as well as a goodly number of triggers.

At this stage in my process, triggers only rarely send me into intense, long-lasting flashbacks. They are more like little reminders that something happened long ago that could use some attention today. I finally can welcome them! I get why my first therapist called them “gifts from the unconscious.” At the time, I wanted to strangle him because they felt like gifts given in the cult, prettily wrapped packages of blood, poo, or the corpse of a pet. Now I understand that my unconscious is suggesting a way to make today’s life a little bit better.

Why did I tell you this? I think it was to explain why I have time and energy for a big rewarding project. Perhaps this is the light I occasionally glimpsed when I was deep in the tunnel.

GrassRoots was envisioned as a place where survivors could come together, find ideas for projects, find volunteers to help them bring their idea to fruition, and read how-to articles on a variety of subjects. We imagined that people who worked together might well “click” and heal a little with and through each other. They might even go on to work on other projects or become personal friends. On many levels, it promised to be a way to break the isolation that so many survivors feel today. And as survivors talk to each other, tell their stories, work together, and form friendships, it breaks the old rules – “Don’t talk,” “You are stupid and incompetent,” “It’s forbidden to have a friend,” “Happiness is evil.”

The process would build community in two different ways, on a micro-level with one-to-one connections and on a macro-level by having more books, art exhibits, podcasts, Webinars, etc., readily available to survivors all over the world.

I must have been a matchmaker in a past life. It gives me so much pleasure to bring people together and have them be grateful to have met each other. Or maybe I was an agent running around finding a publisher for a wonderful book on an unpopular subject.

I remember the joy I felt when I put together poetry readings, first in my living room thirty years ago, then in feminist bookstores. We could speak of things that were taboo, we could witness each other’s pain and struggle to grow, to become healthy, and to create happy, fulfilled lives. I could see joy behind their tears, and my joy was increased ten-fold, twenty-fold, by theirs.

Back then, the joy was ephemeral because I quickly sank back into a stream of flashbacks. Now the flashbacks are far fewer, and I handle them much better. The joy lasts and gives me a desire to do more in and for my community. It’s a feedback loop; the happier I am, the more I do, and the more I do, the happier I am. Of course, I get down at times, but I always seem to pull quickly out of that place of lingering despair and come back to my new normal.

Now the structure of GrassRoots is set up (of course, it needs polishing), and word is getting out. There are quite a few people who are saying,” I can’t right now, but maybe next month, or in the fall, or after my hip replacement.” One day, this little hatchling will take off like a big bird, a bird that keeps growing all its life. And so many people will be cheering it on!

Hey – just had a thought – why not put the GrassRoots newsletter up on this blog? I’ll sneak it in between posts!

~~~~~~~~~

Upcoming Holidays

May
5/15 Full Moon
5/15 – 5/16 Total lunar eclipse visible in south and west Europe, south and west Asia, Africa, much North America, South America, and Antarctica. https://www.timeanddate.com/eclipse/lunar/2022-may-16
5/21 (?) Armed Forces Day
5/26 (?) Ascension Day
5/30 Memorial Day

June
6/5 Pentecost
6/6 (?) Whit Monday
6/12 (?) Trinity Sunday
6/14 Full Moon
6/16 (?) Corpus Christi/Feast of the Body of Christ
6/19 Fathers’ Day
6/21 Summer solstice
6/23 Midsummer’s Eve

6/24 (?) St John’s Day

 

July
7/4 Independence Day

7/13 Full Moon

7/25 St. James’ Day/Festival of the Horned God


7/27 Grand Climax

Dates Important to Nazi and Neo-Nazi groups

6/4 – 6/6  Shavuot (Harvest Festival, Festival of Moses receiving the Ten Commandments)

(NOTE: Not all groups meet on Jewish holidays. Some groups also mark Candlemas, Beltane, Lammas, Halloween, the solstices, and the equinoxes.

~~~~~~~~~~

You can find more information on the following holidays at:

Candlemas – https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2012/01/21/candlemas/
Valentine’s Day – https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2016/02/10/valentines-
Beltane – https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2013/04/28/beltane/
Mothers’ Day – https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2016/04/26/mothers-day/
Fathers’ Day – https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2020/06/20/ritual-abuse-and-fathers-day/
Summer Solstice (corrected text) – https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2013/06/15/well-this-is-embarrassing/
Lammas – https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/category/lamas/
and https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2012/07/23/august-ritual-dates/ 
Feast of the Beast/Bride of Satan: Part 1 – https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2013/08/31/the-feast-of-the-beast/
Feast of the Beast/Bride of Satan: Part 2 – https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2017/03/20/feast-of-the-beast-part-ii/
Fall Equinox – https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2012/09/16/the-fall-equinox/
Halloween (personal) – https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2016/10/11/halloween/ 
Halloween (background) – https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2011/10/02/samhainhalloween/
Thanksgiving – https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2016/11/20/thanksgiving/
Yule/Winter Solstice – https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2012/12/15/yulewinter-solstice/ 

A Wonderful Conference

I just learned of what looks like a fantastic virtual conference – “The International Human Trafficking and Social Justice Conference.” It will be on Wednesday, September 21through Friday, September 23, 2022. https://www.traffickingconference.com/

It brings together people from a variety of professions and backgrounds, people who seldom get a chance to talk to each other, learn of each other’s work, and hear others’ points of view. The topics are broad, too, and it’s not all academic.

Do we belong? Damn right! RA is a form of human trafficking. We just don’t usually think of it that way.

It’s a very inclusive event. If you want to rub elbows with researchers, direct service providers, healthcare professionals, lawyers, law enforcement, professors, college students, survivors, artists, advocates, activists, and sex workers, here is your chance. Cost is free to presenters and survivors and between $75 and $250 for others. CEU’s are offered for social work, counseling, marriage and family therapy, chemical dependency, occupational therapy, public health, health education, nursing, law, and the Department of Developmental Disabilities. (Told you it was inclusive!)

If you would like to browse through past presentations, here’s the 2015 schedule  https://www.traffickingconference.com/past-conferences

Proposals for presentations are being accepted until March 31, 2022, and presenters will be notified by April 29, 2022. Research, academic, practitioner, and SURVIVOR SUBMISSIONS  are all welcome.

I hope to submit a proposal – more on that later.

Details on proposal submission are at: https://ritualabuse.files.wordpress.com/2022/02/382d0-presentationsummarysubmissionguidelines.pdf

And how cool is this?

“The Conference Art Committee is looking for thriver artists for the 19th Annual International Human Trafficking and Social Justice Conference! A thriver artist is someone who has survived an injustice and used art to persevere and make a difference in other’s lives. We are open to visual, performing, and literary art forms. If you are a thriver artist or know of a thriver artist who would like a virtual exhibit dedicated to their art experience, please email Heather Sloane at heather.sloane@utoledo.edu by March 14, 2022.”

How many people reading this could throw together slides, audio recordings of poems, music, or dance presentations and make Heather Sloane happy?????

How many people would like to sign up as a survivor and see what other artists have to say?????

And would anybody like to join me in a panel discussion of the interface between child trafficking, child pornography, RA, cults, and M/C programming techniques??????

I already have one other person who wants to do it and have two others in mind. We could take it on the road and offer the same presentation at the Infinite Minds conference next February, too.

~~~~~~~~~

RA/MC Survivors’ Poetry Reading

The third poetry reading on the 19th went very well. Our three poets were awesome, and so were the poems read by audience members. There will be another reading in June, and I hope lots more after that one.

I haven’t come down from the high yet, and it shows through in my writing about this conference. I’m also pleased with how far I have come since the first reading, which terrified me. I have learned that I make far fewer mistakes than I anticipate and that when I do goof, it’s not the end of the world. It just adds a human touch!

~~~~~~~~~

Upcoming Holidays

February
2/21 (?) Presidents’ Day/Washington’s birthday
2/25 Walpurgis Day

March
3/1 Shrove Tuesday/ Mardi Gras
3/1 St David’s Day (patron saint of Wales)
3/2 Ash Wednesday/beginning of Lent
3/1 St. Eichstadt’s Day
3/17 St. Patrick’s Day (patron saint of Ireland)
3/18 Full Moon
3/21 Spring Equinox

April
4/1 April Fool’s Day
4/8 Day of the Masters
4/10 Palm Sunday
4/14 Maundy Thursday (commemoration of the Last Supper)
4/15 Good Friday
4/16 Holy Saturday
4/16 Full Moon
4/17 Easter Sunday

Dates Important to Nazi and Neo-Nazi groups

3/17-18 Purim (Deliverance of the Jewish people from Haman in Persia)
4/15-4/23 Passover/Pesach (Celebration of the deliverance of the Jewish people from slavery in Egypt.)

(NOTE: Not all groups meet on Jewish holidays. Some groups also mark Candlemas, Beltane, Lammas, Halloween, the solstices, and the equinoxes.)

~~~~~~~~~~ 

You can find more information on the following holidays at:

Candlemas – https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2012/01/21/candlemas/
Valentine’s Day – https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2016/02/10/valentines-day/
Spring Equinox – https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2012/02/13/the-spring-equinox/
Easter: personal (for background, see Spring Equinox) – https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2014/04/21/easter-blues/
Walpurgisnacht/May Eve – https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2017/04/20/walpurgisnacht/
Beltane – https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2013/04/28/beltane/
Mothers’ Day – https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2016/04/26/mothers-day/
Fathers’ Day – https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2020/06/20/ritual-abuse-and-fathers-day/
Summer Solstice (corrected text) – https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2013/06/15/well-this-is-embarrassing/
Lammas – https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/category/lamas/
and https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2012/07/23/august-ritual-dates/ 
Feast of the Beast/Bride of Satan: Part 1 – https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2013/08/31/the-feast-of-the-beast/
Feast of the Beast/Bride of Satan: Part 2 – https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2017/03/20/feast-of-the-beast-part-ii/
Fall Equinox – https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2012/09/16/the-fall-equinox/
Halloween (personal) – https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2016/10/11/halloween/ 
Halloween (background) – https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2011/10/02/samhainhalloween/
Thanksgiving – https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2016/11/20/thanksgiving/
Yule/Winter Solstice – https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2012/12/15/yulewinter-solstice/ 

Eventbrite invitation to ra/mc poetry reading

Here is the Eventbrite invitation

eventbrite.com.au/e/ritual-abuse-survivors-read-their-poems-of-suffering-and-healing-tickets-179703978437

This link leads to the webpage where you register, where you get your ticket, where you can contact us (at the very bottom of the page.)

Forward it to as many people as you want. All are welcome: survivors, therapists, and other allies.

Registering adds you to our mailing list.

Hope to see all of you there!

An online poetry reading by and for ritual abuse/mind control survivors.

Please join us on Saturday 23 October, 4:00 pm to 5:30 pm (Pacific Daylight Time) for an online poetry reading by ritual abuse/mind control survivors.

There will be 45 minutes of scheduled poetry readings, with the final 45 minutes allocated for an open mic poetry session (readers to nominate themselves on the day – 3 to 5 minutes per person) and for any questions and conversation.

Ritual abuse and mind control, by their very nature, can trigger strong emotions. The poetry will not be censored and we are not asking the poets to give trigger warnings. We will give a general trigger warning and suggestions for self-care at the start of the program.

This invite is open to survivors, therapists, support people and allies.

Presented by:
Jean Riseman, River and Leni of GrassRoots Ritual Abuse/Mind Control Survivors Collective
Chaired by Leni of Grassroots Collective

Please review the time zone in your local area. Time zones include:
Saturday October 23, 4:00 pm – 5:30 pm Pacific Daylight Time
Saturday October 23, 5:00 pm – 6:30 pm Mountain Daylight Time
Saturday October 23, 6:00 pm – 7:30 pm Central Daylight Time
Saturday October 23, 7:00 am – 8:30 pm East Coast Daylight Time
Sunday October 24, 10:00 am -11:30 am Melbourne AEST

AT THE BOTTOM OF THE PAGE
Grassroots RA/MC Collective
Organiser of Ritual Abuse Survivors Read Their Poems of Suffering and Healing

[Follow] [Contact]

How to sign up:

To sign up, click the button labeled “Register” at the right of the announcement.

On the next page, click “Register.” No typing is required (or possible) on this page.

On the next page, fill out everything and, once again ,click “Register.”

The following text appears on the final page

Thanks for your order!

ticket #1234567890

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Eventbrite invitation to ra/mc poetry reading

Here is the Eventbrite invitation

eventbrite.com.au/e/ritual-abuse-survivors-read-their-poems-of-suffering-and-healing-tickets-179703978437

This link leads to the webpage where you register, where you get your ticket, where you can contact us (at the very bottom of the page.)

Forward it to as many people as you want. All are welcome: survivors, therapists, and other allies.

Registering adds you to our mailing list.

Hope to see all of you there!



An online poetry reading by and for ritual abuse/mind control survivors.

Please join us on Saturday 23 October, 4:00 pm to 5:30 pm (Pacific Daylight Time) for an online poetry reading by ritual abuse/mind control survivors.

There will be 45 minutes of scheduled poetry readings, with the final 45 minutes allocated for an open mic poetry session (readers to nominate themselves on the day – 3 to 5 minutes per person) and for any questions and conversation.

Ritual abuse and mind control, by their very nature, can trigger strong emotions. The poetry will not be censored and we are not asking the poets to give trigger warnings. We will give a general trigger warning and suggestions for self-care at the start of the program.

This invite is open to survivors, therapists, support people and allies.



Presented by:
Jean Riseman, River and Leni of GrassRoots Ritual Abuse/Mind Control Survivors Collective
Chaired by Leni of Grassroots Collective



Please review the time zone in your local area. Time zones include:
Saturday October 23, 4:00 pm – 5:30 pm Pacific Daylight Time
Saturday October 23, 5:00 pm – 6:30 pm Mountain Daylight Time
Saturday October 23, 6:00 pm – 7:30 pm Central Daylight Time
Saturday October 23, 7:00 am – 8:30 pm East Coast Daylight Time
Sunday October 24, 10:00 am -11:30 am Melbourne AEST



AT THE BOTTOM OF THE PAGE
Grassroots RA/MC Collective
Organiser of Ritual Abuse Survivors Read Their Poems of Suffering and Healing

[Follow] [Contact]

How to sign up:

To sign up, click the button labeled “Register” at the right of the announcement.

On the next page, click “Register.” No typing is required (or possible) on this page.

On the next page, fill out everything and, once again ,click “Register.”

The following text appears on the final page


Thanks for your order!

ticket #1234567890

YOU’RE GOING TO
Ritual Abuse Survivors Read Their Poems of Suffering and Healing
1 Ticket sent to
me@ssomething.com
DATE
Sat, 23 Oct 2021 4:00 PM – 5:30 PM PDT
ONLINE EVENT
You will receive the link to the event content in your order confirmation email, and in a reminder email before the event starts.



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YOU’RE GOING TO
Ritual Abuse Survivors Read Their Poems of Suffering and Healing
1 Ticket sent to
me@ssomething.com
DATE
Sat, 23 Oct 2021 4:00 PM – 5:30 PM PDT
ONLINE EVENT
You will receive the link to the event content in your order confirmation email, and in a reminder email before the event starts.