Ritual Abuse – the Gift that Keeps on Giving

Upcoming Satanic and Nazi holidays  
Please note that Satanic sects build the year around pagan holidays Christian holidays, and major secular holidays. It is the Neo-Nazi groups that defile Jewish holidays.
Also see: August Ritual Dates https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2012/07/23/august-ritual-dates/
Fall Equinox https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2012/09/16/the-fall-equinox/
Labor Day https://ritualabuse.wordpress.com/2013/08/20/labor-day/
9/1 (Nazi) Start of WW2:  9/5 (Satanic) Labor Day (US and Canada):  9/5 – 9/7 (Satanic) Marriage to the Beast:  9/7 (Satanic) Feast of the Beast:  9/16 (Satanic) Full Moon:  9/17 (Nazi) Hitler’s alternate half-birthday:  9/20 – 9/21 (Satanic) Midnight Host:  9/22 (Satanic and Nazi) Fall Equinox

 

Some gift.

First I thought that when I became independent and didn’t have to do what my parents said, things would be fine.

Then I thought if I could only figure out what was wrong with me, I would be fine.

If I married, if I had kids, if I went to graduate school, if I lost five pounds, I finally would be happy.

Then I thought if I could shake my depression, I would be fine.

I got married, had kids, got my degree, and am no longer depressed, thanks to Wellbutron. I still have a few pounds to lose  –  aha! that must be it!

Seriously, what’s wrong is my ritual abuse background. I’ve worked like hell on ritual abuse for many years, and I think things are probably almost as good as they are going to get. They might slowly get even a little bit better in the next few years. If they do, I won’t complain.

It’s true. Ritual abuse affects your whole life, every single year of it, right through the “Golden Years.” <snicker>

I’ll tell you what set off this rant. An article from WebMD News by Amy Norton entitled “Serious Infections Tied to Suicide Risk: Danish study finds greater association in those hospitalized with HIV or hepatitis.” It is an easy-to-read description of an article by  Lena C. Brundin, MD, PhD and Jamie Grit, BSc  “Ascertaining Whether Suicides Are Caused by Infections.” JAMA Psychiatry online, August 10, 2016. It is at https://archpsyc.jamanetwork.com/article.aspx?articleid=2542678  The abstract and first page are free; the rest of article can be purchased. The WebMD article is at http://www.webmd.com/mental-health/news/20160810/serious-infections-tied-to-suicide-risk

Denmark has kept marvelous medical records since 1977. The National Patient Registry includes all inpatient, outpatient, and emergency room visits. It is a health care statistician’s dream come true.

The authors studied patients who had been hospitalized for infections and compared them to those who had not had infections. Their suicide rate was 42% higher. The suicide rate of people hospitalized with HIV/AIDS or hepatitis, both really serious infections, was more than twice that of people who had had neither HIV/AIDS or hepatitis.

It’s known (but not by me, this was the first I had heard of it) that inflammation can cause depression. Interferon, used to treat some infections and some cancers, causes an inflammatory response; almost half the people on interferon become seriously depressed. It’s not that it’s depressing to have an infection or cancer because people taking other drugs have far lower rates of depression.

So…inflammatory factors can cross the blood/brain barrier. If my body is inflamed, I get depressed. And if I am depressed, my body becomes inflamed.

One of the main after-effects of ritual abuse is depression. If the body isn’t already inflamed from the abuse (which it surely is), the depression causes inflammation. Or makes the body become more inflamed. That explains why so many us are chronically sick – and depressed – as adults.

I’ll offer myself as an example. Looking back, I can see I was clearly depressed by first grade. Suicidal ideation appeared briefly as an adolescent and then became chronic in my late thirties. Interestingly, when I was thirty I had a mysterious illness that caused pain in my hands, arms and legs. It hurt to even hold a pen. Was it fibromyalgia? The only diagnosis offered was, “Middle-aged women sometimes get this.” It cleared up in my forties when I took an antidepressant.

Unfortunately, the antidepressants I took made me gain 80 pounds. Obesity causes inflammation. Inflammation causes arthritis. Arthritis causes inflammation. Luckily the antidepressant I am on now doesn’t make me gain weight. I am on antidepressants for life because every time I try to stop I fall into a black depression and the suicidal thoughts come back.

After living with arthritis for over twenty years, I can no longer walk without a walker and can only go about a quarter of a block without sitting down. I don’t know what the next chapter of this story will be, but I hope the pace of the arthritis will slow now that I am neither obese nor depressed.

I think that if we could take great good care of our bodies when we are young we could avoid some of the conditions that cause inflammation. Dealing with the ritual abuse itself can lessen depression. Then we might get fewer diseases that cause inflammation when we get older and our depressions might be milder. But it is unrealistic to expect this amount of self-care when we have no idea that we are ritual abuse survivors or we are in the early chaotic stages of remembering. It takes all our energy just to stay alive. Besides, we were not taught self-care as kids and we have to painstakingly learn it as adults.

It is so unfair. There ought to be a rule that a person only has so much suffering in their life. Or that they get equal amounts of suffering and happiness. But it doesn’t work that way. The shadow of ritual abuse falls across our whole lives, like it or not.

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5 thoughts on “Ritual Abuse – the Gift that Keeps on Giving

  1. Dear Jean,
    thanks a lot for this wonderful article which will help me a lot to manage my therapies, as I pratice both short term therapy & energetic healing …
    The link you establish between antidpressants, inflammation, arthritis & physical /psychic /sexual abuse is very enlightning.
    I advise you to resort to Biofeedback / Bioresonance as well : it’s a very powerful quantum therapy & deals with both the stabilization & harmonization of the mind & the body.
    Cheers,
    E.*

    1. Dear E*

      I am glad you find this information useful. The mind and body are so connected that it hits our entrenched dualism.

      I know about biofeedback and will read up on bioresonance.

  2. This was some incredible insight. Thank you for sharing this information and your personal example.

    On a personal note, Wellbutrin has been a life-saver for me as well, in the lineup of anti-depressants, mood stabilizers, and anti-psychotics I have tried.

    One of the things I, of course, like with Wellbutrin was the added benefit that it was one of the few that did NOT cause weight gain. After reading this, it really raises some questions internally on if it can be helping on a physical level (I am already aware that it helps with neuron growth in the hippocampus which is essential to my dealing with PTSD). This was a great post.

    Thanks for sharing!

    -Nel

    1. ear Nel:

      Thanks for telling me it helps the hippocampus. I haven’t noticed any difference, but I will take it on faith. That would be a great plus.

      I also like that Wellburin doesn’t damp my feelings as much as the others — I can even cry!

      I’ve taken it long enough that some annoying side effects have appeared. I get ‘restless leg” at night every few weeks. Klonopin calms it down. If I don’t take klonopin, my legs spasm for 2-3 hours. I have trouble getting the right word sometimes, words I know that I know. Sometimes fancy words, like spelunker more often everyday words like trash can. The most bothersome one is tinnitus. If I am with people or absorbed in what I am doing, I don’t notice it. I am most aware of it during the night. Supposedly there is a way to train the brain to ignore the frequencies of the ringing in my ears, but I haven’t tried it yet. It helps to know they are side effects, because I don’t worry about having a whole new disease.

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